Seating plan stress: our top tips

This part of the planning often proves to be one of the most challenging parts for brides and grooms - or one that catches them by surprise! Plotting to sit your closest group of family and friends may seem like an easy feat, but the reality is quite different. We’ve detailed some tips for you to consider that may help overcome any obstacles.

Number 1: this should be a task for just the two of you. Take heed of the phrase: too many cooks will spoil the broth.

Number 2: get a big glass of wine - you could be in for a long evening.

Number 3: by the time you’re sitting down to do your seating plan, this element will be decided so it’s one to consider in the early stages: your table formation. Do you see advantages in having round or long tables? Some make their choice based on aesthetics or conversation opportunities; others are dictated by their venue or marquee. It also defines the number of people to a table so it’s an important factor.

Number 4: if you’re like me, you’ll want to visualise the plan. Find a big surface and place sticky notes with your table numbers onto it. Print and cut individual names or allocate a sticky tag to each guest. One thing to be sure of: this will take more than one go, so a pencil and a piece of paper just isn’t going to cut it. For the more technical minded of us, there are programmes online where this can be done.

Number 5: start with yourselves. Where do you want to be in the room and who do you want on your table and on the tables around you? Do you want to follow tradition or will you surround yourselves with friends; allowing immediate family and bridal party members to “host” tables.

Number 6: don’t be afraid to mix up your friends, family, colleagues and even generations. It breaks up any natural cliques and allows guests from different stages of your lives to get to know each other. Find a balance though, so that people feel comfortable with old and new faces.

Number 7: resist the urge to create a single’s table. Don’t get me wrong, a discretionally plotted seat here and there is fine - after all, we all love a story where romance is found at a wedding - but you don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable.

Number 8: children’s tables. If you’ve opted to have children at your wedding then it may be sensible to have a separate table for them or even a play area (with a dedicated babysitter, if required) that they can be at during dinner. It allows the parents to relax, and the children to have as much as fun as everyone else.

Number 9: try not to over-think it. Spend an evening putting the first plan in place. Look back on it with fresh eyes the next day, and then try to leave it be.

Grace Pigott27 March 2020